Comments on: Talk to kids about abuse! http://eft.fabglitter.org/blog/?p=89 Exploring the effects of abuse and the tools that heal them. Tue, 31 Aug 2010 15:43:27 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Facing Abuse » Blog Archive » Thirteen books about abuse, addiction, and recovery http://eft.fabglitter.org/blog/?p=89&cpage=1#comment-1385 Facing Abuse » Blog Archive » Thirteen books about abuse, addiction, and recovery Fri, 23 May 2008 21:04:36 +0000 http://eft.fabglitter.org/blog/?p=89#comment-1385 [...] no matter how interesting they sound, for what I think are pretty common reasons. They seem scary - another case of associating talking about trauma with the trauma itself. And another case of the common problem many abuse survivors have of being afraid of our feelings. [...] [...] no matter how interesting they sound, for what I think are pretty common reasons. They seem scary – another case of associating talking about trauma with the trauma itself. And another case of the common problem many abuse survivors have of being afraid of our feelings. [...]

]]> By: Facing Abuse » Blog Archive » Dos and Don’ts for abuse discussions http://eft.fabglitter.org/blog/?p=89&cpage=1#comment-590 Facing Abuse » Blog Archive » Dos and Don’ts for abuse discussions Sat, 26 Apr 2008 05:22:48 +0000 http://eft.fabglitter.org/blog/?p=89#comment-590 [...] These are my suggestions for talking to children about abuse, based on my personal experiences…. [...] [...] These are my suggestions for talking to children about abuse, based on my personal experiences…. [...]

]]> By: Drea http://eft.fabglitter.org/blog/?p=89&cpage=1#comment-506 Drea Thu, 24 Apr 2008 17:34:16 +0000 http://eft.fabglitter.org/blog/?p=89#comment-506 I dont think spanking is wrong. And I just had to add my 2 cents about the comment that it does not teach a child.. and that it just teaches them you dont want them to do something. I think at a young age children need to learn authority... and we as parents are that authority. I also believe that if spanked correctly a child will learn why they were spanked.. and why the behavior was wrong. Any time I spank my child (Just so you know I have a 3 1/2 year old and 1 year old - the 1 year old isnt really spanked yet, hes to young... but the 3 year old isnt) We talk about why the spanking happened. I will ask him what he feels he did to get a spanking.. and then I explain to him why his actions were wrong.. and why mommy had to spank. I also express to him how we (mommy and daddy) do not like to spank him.. but that we do it as a way to correct his disobedience. Our child has never once acted scared of us.. he is very open with us. Grant it he is 3 and hes open with almost anyone haha. But the thing is he understands what results in a spanking and when he is spanked we explain it each and every time. He even tells ladies he knows in our church why he gets spanked. he was walking down the hall one time with an older lady in our church and said "ms... dar-ween (darlene) this is the room my daddy had to pank me... because I wouldnt listen" He said it in a way with such innocence and that he knew and understood why it had to happen.(the lady who he told this , told us. she thought it was really sweet how he told her and explained to her why it got spanked) an yhow. I think we all should be slow to judge.. and even if we parent different than others that just because we spank does not make us an abusive parent or unloving parent. Just on our way home today from the park my 3 year old said "mommy. I love you" and I responded back "I love you 2 Caleb" he then said " I love you so much mama..." and I said "me 2" He is loved and he loves us. I believe firmly in the way we discipline our child and have never once thought about it as child abuse. the time out chair and naughty step just dont cut it in this house. We see a huge difference in his obedience when we are firm in disciplining him. Drea's last blog post at their site, http://dreawd.blogspot.com: <a href="http://dreawd.blogspot.com/2008/04/scab-fell.html" rel="nofollow">The Scab fell!</a> I dont think spanking is wrong. And I just had to add my 2 cents about the comment that it does not teach a child.. and that it just teaches them you dont want them to do something.

I think at a young age children need to learn authority… and we as parents are that authority. I also believe that if spanked correctly a child will learn why they were spanked.. and why the behavior was wrong.

Any time I spank my child (Just so you know I have a 3 1/2 year old and 1 year old – the 1 year old isnt really spanked yet, hes to young… but the 3 year old isnt)
We talk about why the spanking happened. I will ask him what he feels he did to get a spanking.. and then I explain to him why his actions were wrong.. and why mommy had to spank. I also express to him how we (mommy and daddy) do not like to spank him.. but that we do it as a way to correct his disobedience.

Our child has never once acted scared of us.. he is very open with us. Grant it he is 3 and hes open with almost anyone haha. But the thing is he understands what results in a spanking and when he is spanked we explain it each and every time.

He even tells ladies he knows in our church why he gets spanked. he was walking down the hall one time with an older lady in our church and said “ms… dar-ween (darlene) this is the room my daddy had to pank me… because I wouldnt listen”

He said it in a way with such innocence and that he knew and understood why it had to happen.(the lady who he told this , told us. she thought it was really sweet how he told her and explained to her why it got spanked)

an yhow.

I think we all should be slow to judge.. and even if we parent different than others that just because we spank does not make us an abusive parent or unloving parent.

Just on our way home today from the park my 3 year old said “mommy. I love you” and I responded back “I love you 2 Caleb” he then said ” I love you so much mama…” and I said “me 2″

He is loved and he loves us. I believe firmly in the way we discipline our child and have never once thought about it as child abuse.

the time out chair and naughty step just dont cut it in this house. We see a huge difference in his obedience when we are firm in disciplining him.

Drea’s last blog post at their site, http://dreawd.blogspot.com: The Scab fell!

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